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Balancing Tech at Home in 2022

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In this presentation, Ms. Receveur, Technology Specialist & Mrs. Gerstner, Primary Teacher, guide you through fun tech choices, creating boundaries, modeling behaviors as parents with tech, and what pitfalls to avoid.

Show Transcript

Nine season 4 start and I teach in the primary 23 classroom as a lot of integration so that's why I'm here and we wanted to can I do this now as opposed to after break just because we know we are coming on a couple of weeks off and often when we have a lot of that idle down time it becomes a little bit harder if parents or us to manage screen time and that we wanted to really do this number have this conversation now and not just give you those printers and guidelines but really talk about how we can be mindful and how we can make our experiences on technology a little more positive I do feel like that a lot of research and a lot of the experts are kind of changing their tune a little bit we know that technology is here to stay and we know that there are so many wonderful ways that we can be using it and so it's it's kind of moving away not demonizing the technology and really thinking more of the family power you know how are we setting up our parameters within our home that work for us and then what are we what are we what examples are we setting for our children and how are we kind of you know continuing those timer patient so that we can have a pot of it. And you have questions while we're going if you would like to use the chat for this question Olivia now we is on and she will kind of mayonnaise. And if there's a question that's like pertinent to what we're talking about show positive and then if not we'll come back to those at the end will he has no no no technology but how because we did it tear how can we just be more mindful of it over winter break but then also just beyond for sure our all right so you can present is supposed to be like okay thank you sorry about that notification from you just a little comic for you guys to enjoy the Latin airplane do it today we hope to arm you with some data and research and to give you tips on how to mindful about your family's Technologies that's just as we talk about what's important to remember as we go through this and that we are models for our kids and so we're talking as we were unicorn getting Dustin think about all the ways in which we kind of misuse technology in her own home maybe not misuse but we use but we do things that we may be artists product with our children you know how many of us take out Arthur when we're waiting for you know our TV show to come back on during during the commercial break or when we're waiting in line at the supermarket kind of those like downtime those moments where we just are not being a left we're not leaving or so the one with our own thoughts were occupying our brains and so just thinking about her own habits and how that translates your kids and how we ourselves can just see those models that we want our children do here so here's what we know about Technologies to our phones and asked our by Design addictive attention-seekers I am totally you know responsible for my own behavior when it comes to my cell phone it's hard it has my email and has my Facebook and has my text messages all the ways in which I connect with people in different states family my friend my husband has all of those things and just become you know you'll get on Instagram and I'll look up at the clock and it's been 20 minutes that I've just been mindlessly scrolling through Instagram and so they are addictive you know and it's hard to think of them as something that you can get addicted to you but it is true they can cause them anxiety and social media use go hand-in-hand so anxious about something that is it like in real life rights of creating other areas of anxiety that we just don't need because kids are already anxious Enough by filling our in between time like commute or in conversation causes Orwell wait in line at the store we're baring our faces and our phone so just like we were talking about I'm so guilty of that I hate waiting through commercials for my TV show to come or the ad that I have to you don't go through on Hulu because I refused to pay the extra $6 a month for no ads right so I just can't stand to be sitting there with what I consider wasting my time until my phone totally guilty of that so we lose the ability to be alone with our thoughts which you don't really think of that is something that's important but it actually is because if it has a lot to do with being self-aware and thinking through things not just a life so there's no mental state if there's no mental space that means that there's limited creativity and minimal deep thinking so you know our goal is to just leave have some more time with her own thoughts and a lack of deep thinking equal limited personal growth so that time in between my TV show could be time I could be thinking about kind of more important things in my life right let's not waste the time it's time that we can use to be deeper thinkers I guess so as we know we're addicted to being connected with each other not the device the teams are Tethered to their devices hoping to make a connection so you don't lie and I were talking about this that technology is wonderful in classrooms around the world you know Siri connected to people around the world and that's a positive but it can also keep us Tethered to those devices in an effort to make more and more connection know it's kind of a balancing act you want those connections happen but not to a point where it becomes obsessive right addicted to multitasking we talked a lot about on kids having low attention fans because they're so used to looking through no apps and pages and I can't tell you how frustrated I get when my internet doesn't work and it's just they're right I don't have the patience because my phone is supposed to move at the speed of lightning so it really just causes what we call a stress do so Tech it's one ingredient it is easier to blame the technology right though it's not the whole cause of strapped in people's lives but it is a piece of it is time wasted I'm so bummed that I wasted that much time on my phone you know the relationships that you have through your phone and how that stresses you out so it's a piece of stress but it's not the whole part of it and really encouraging Tech in short bursts to be used as a way to manage anxiety and stress though on the other hand of that you know a kid who's really a stop right now or really stressed out short First Technology can be helped to bring them back down and to calm them to get their mind to focus on just one thing though it's a balancing act right. Good or bad so just as we are talking about emotions of Technology it to miss diminishes the home Ernest taking away that thinks time on your on your own just being able to know rather than taking your phone out at the at the grocery store like Look Around You observe other people observe you know interactions have your if you're with your childlike observes those things with them right be patient be calm and not make it weekend self-regulation diminishes social skills you know if we're just focusing on our phone we're not having the in-person social skills and experiences that we need to grow and it undermines the fees you know it's so much easier to be name an unkind and to make choices that you wouldn't make in the classroom or at home in person it makes it so much easier to make those choices when you just start looking at a computer screen or an ASI and so it really undermines that empathy peace and being able to put yourself in other people's shoes and then it sends motivation how much easier to just lay in bed on your phone right give you all the things that you think you need right and so those are just some of the things we want you to be aware of with excessive technology is and how I think the question is how do we combat that knowing that LG's ever-present what are some ways that we can encourage technology to be on the more positive side and I and I think one thing that you know had been interesting as we kind of like do back and looking for some research what are the experts saying now that we are coming out of hopefully coming out of this pandemic and that has really changed everything for everyone but I think it's really a lot for our children who all the sudden the bear you know their digital world became their only World in which they could really connect outside of their house and I think you know black and white anymore as is it good technology has its bad technology and so we just want to ship that conversation to that mindfulness piece and just really as a parent you know what they don't they try to make this part of our job Bob to be very in tune with what they're doing and then decline to constantly be having these check in and follow up and conversation with them as they change and they grow I'm about what's working for them and not working that technology piece if you know it is here to stay and we feel like it's just kind of getting yet another you know another thing that as parents we really have to really be zoned in on this is just kind of a lie that summarizes reiterates a lot of what season was saying that you know technology can be helpful and I think the one thing that I've learned the most is where that used to be how many hours can I spend the day on Tech you know what are the guidelines now the silent really say that our kids shouldn't be on any device for longer than a 20 to 30 minutes. Right there would be short bursts with a break away from technology in between and it's not so much how much time a cruise over the the day it's just our kids getting a break from that screen and are they engaging in playing in real life and in person as well yeah we have a lot of extracurriculars going on let me know depending on especially their kids get older with 14 you know so that so those short burst of technology in between all of that action and activity can be helpful we know it is a great way to stay connected outside of school it's a positive and students to have relationship outside of just their school community and the technology and social media you know really help kids maintain that it can to promote empathy right do you have support I'm thinking of you to send a message to send an email you know to comment on a picture depending on you know which platform they're using and you know a lot of the different platforms comedian once you know you can follow account that are very inspirational that you don't post motivational quotes and so it can be a place where we can kind of go with our children to find that motivation and inspiration if you have a you know if you have a young girl who's interested in playing a certain sport it going fine those professional athletes in and see their Instagram page or their self and then it and it can help with that mood management peace acting kind of the anxiety if you knew it would be a it would be a conversation you want to have with your child but it if that is a stress reliever for your child then that could be something that they can toolbox of what can I do when I feel overwhelmed or when I feel uncomfortable or sad but just constantly checking in that we're not Crossing that line and it becomes a crutch or that it then becomes something that's affecting our kids negatively that is just some moments that we might want to take a pause if you're observing your child using technology or afterward and you realize that they're starting to lose interest in their other activities and they don't want to go outside anymore and play they don't want to participate in sports or you know do anything outside of that that that piece of technology so that would be a time we want to take a pod if they're not sleeping I'll talk in a minute just about the effects of screens on are sleeping I mean is Bergdorf but also for our children if they're having repetitive bad digital interactions like with cyberbullying a lot of time that's a lot of times it means we should pause and kind of back up and look like Susan talk about the whole address to unitec is one piece of that but if they're if they're not if they're struggling offline than often they will bring those truck struggle to the digital space it just looks a little different so and then again this with social media especially that applies a little bit for kids that are a little bit older but you can really ruin it and you're able to look back at our there's bigger also able to look back and feed negative experiences that time you might have had it could be in just like a saved message if you have like you know even like a Roblox account and they're in there and they're messaging and they didn't feel good or kind of continuing to focus instead of focusing on how do I move forward but those are just a couple of things that would cause us to want to pause and have conversations with ourselves the parents and also with her so sweet we know as adults and again this is kind of a time to stop and think about yourself and what your habits are with your phone before you go to bed if you've ever been no we've all heard all of this before but if you ever actually let you know implemented a few of small changes I know I for one have if it really helped but we know that digital media at night can interfere with how we sleep it's recommended that tablets computers for kids and phone TV screen should all be completely turned off restricted for at least 30 minutes before we go to bed. That you would want to give your brain freeze that but I feel is that realistically you know we try to say okay if we know bedtimes at 8 then by 7 or 7:30 we need to turn the TV off me to put our screens away and then just thinking twice about letting our kids take their devices into their bedroom anytime but especially after lights out so so the kind of like you know all that science behind that is at the blue light before bed it makes us feel like we're jet-lagged and the blue light in our phones and our screens and a lot of us have the fun on Blue Light glasses now but it delays the release of melatonin and it makes you more alert and then it actually will reset your internal clock to a later schedule so if I'm using my for 2 hours and usually my body starts to release that melatonin at 8 but I've been on my phone till 10 it's not until I get off my phone that my body is going to start that shut down process and so that's kind of why we get wired when we lay in bed can we look at our phones over on her iPad and talked about it. We all know it where you pick up your phone to answer one email in 30 minutes later you like come out of a fog in your like where am I what happened and you know why am I on Instagram page depending on what we're looking at if we can get emotionally worked out we all know when it comes to YouTube you know Facebook Tik Tok Instagram if you would were scrolling always in control of what comes up on our screen and so especially with everything is going on right now in Kentucky there's a lot of stories that pop up on my social media just been there and they're very you know heartbreaking heart-wrenching stories but if it's allowed pocket night and I pull out my phone and I see that you're here I am worked up and I'm upset and so it was really encouraged to avoid that device check before bed for adults you know for kids I think that's why it's really encouraged that we just don't take our Isis into our bedroom always turning off notifications do if your child is of an age where they have their own phone or they have their own iPad or tablet they don't need that constant being again kind of Heather's them to their device like didn't talked about it also trains them when I think it for adults for me it is so hard even if my phones on silent and I hear it vibrate you know it's so hard for us not to respond. Notifications do think about how hard you know for your child I know you do my thing and I ignore it they can't help but go and find it and bring it to me you know so I can notifications are just keeping our notifications on do not disturb especially at night but you know the device curfew I think is so so important specially for our immediate families 2 leaving Jantzen and choosing a middle school most middle school program require a device most likely a Chromebook and does often are devices that go home with you and so not allowing our children to have access to those past our curfew right and then plugging them in in your bedroom or in the kitchen or you know in that, using a common space where are you because it's hard enough for me as an adult to say I'm not going to use my phone sitting next to me right I can't resist that it's just going to be tempting for them to go and look at something just do one more thing even if it's a full Latino school-related assignment so we really encourage those devices at the flick my classroom I can't even use until 8 a.m. because it's turned off so like they're in sleep mode with the pretzel so if you know they want to have their device in the room or if that's where it is that's fine but there are ways to make but if they can't use the device between I would just encourage you guys to Google parental controls or whatever devices that you have and choose the ones that you think that that's for your family in your knees for me this is often kind of the hardest part of wanting to come up with a new technology plan for our home and our family but you know how do we cut our children screen time we have I know to ourselves first and that looks like you know possibly coming up with certain times and certain places in our home that we're going to do scream free but if I say no phones at the dinner table then you know if I should be on my foot dinner table because we we know that our children are always watching and they're they're very mine are very quick to say hey Mom you said no phones right now or you said no screen so why are you looking at I'll let you know if I am or if I'm not and then if you know this important really really trying to stop and look at ourselves and how we use our technology and as we move into these conversations at home with our family having these are having conversations regularly right not just letting sitting down one time having a station and thinking that's going to be good to go you know we know we have to constantly revisit what's working with not working you know depending on the age of your child but especially for our primary and intermediate friend really helping them develop that metacognition so thinking about what works for me and what doesn't write what do I like about this platform what it what do I not like what doesn't feel good really helping them identify trigger this in their option when I feel this way what can I do what are some strategies to really Empower them so that we're not sitting here are the rules here's what you do it just turned off that we're letting them being a little bit more control how they use their check family meetings are great and end the one thing that I think is really important is that I'm going to sit down and have a family meeting about technology and how how we want to make some changes and what works for asking I want to invoice call them in that conversation I want there I wanted to be there words and their ideas right they're really taking the time to lead them to the to that place but then also coming with some ideas of what can we do if we're not using technology we can just say go in the outside and play because if your kids are like my kids I say that I open the door and two minutes later they're like I'm bored what do you want to do now so so actually coming up with that started my kids were so we made a list and we put it up on the refrigerator and I said we can try to you know tackle one or two a day and so then it became a week and I was like no one's even asked me for an iPad right because they had these ideas of things they could do on their own and then think they needed me to do depending on your kids what works for you guys in your house and so these are just some ideas for that conversation when you go in to talk to try to help them with that mindfulness and their technology how do you want to use the platform right what do you like about this app or this video or the video game what goes all for you you know what the course I think they'll have lots of quick answers but then really trying to lead them into that what is hard for you and then and to share sometimes you know depending on your your your child you may have to share first I know for me you know when I'm watching a video online my eyes start to her and then I realize that you're talking to me and I'm not even paying attention so I don't like how that feels when I realize I've been ignoring you and just kind of be there still boards and really try to help them verbalize what what doesn't always feel good about using that text and then and then what can you do when you feel you know my when my eyes feel tie what can what can I do and then is the parent where can I be help when I think this is the hardest place because it's not time for me to explain why too much time on it screen is bad for them and I don't care so it really is my biggest challenges a parent is just to let you know when when when the my child has decided they're done with that right but I think because we know that we're constantly revisiting and following up that I will have a chance at some point to you no pepper and pieces of that large lecture that I would love to go but I can make it much more meaningful when I've engaged my child and they're the ones coming forth with the information and suggestions and it's not just parents and you can model this you know with your own child you know like if you really enjoy Instagram or you really enjoy Facebook model going through each of these questions what do you like about Facebook what do you like about Facebook you do for me but seeing videos and photos of my family members right who don't live in the same state what's hard for me it's hard sometimes to see news articles about the doctors in Kentucky or the homeless. it's hard to see these videos of people who are struggling right and so sometimes and just sharing those dealing with them too as you go through this process of that maybe it can name some of those feelings and it's not always like structure of the app but emotions that some of the things that you're being make you feel it Sunday name those feelings for them and so that's also just a great way to model this kind of process as you enter into these conversations little bit earlier about just making coming up with again what works for you but these are some suggestions on boundaries for family time right and turkey times and your child day were it would be super beneficial for us to all be unplugged so that picking up or dropping off children at school the transitional time you know even sometimes I feel like my kids aren't but it's just important for them that I'm there and I'm listening for when they want to share you know they're wondering what are we doing next what comes next so we're having this conversation you know I know our car has TVs in it in an infant so that even if my devices aren't in the car or someone wants my phone because they want to play a song there's just all these small ways that I don't even think about the fact that we're not unplugged but if if we're not like that I'm not as present and their net worth engaged as we could be the same as if you know who is if parents work out of the house when you get home right at that that immediate time for us to reconnect during meal time in especially when dining out and do with young child sometimes it feels like oh yeah exactly and thinking back to our shop you know my childhood where we sat down and we had dinner and I didn't mean that I was always in a good mood when we were having a conversation but we were sitting down and we were having a meal together every night and everyone was present and there wasn't an option to have a phone there with you you know but just really reconnecting as a family and then it and then you know during our trips going out to take your kids to the zoo you're on a vacation really just trying to focus on the family time and if you know if we're not allowing them to have their screens trying to be a part of that solution and plan as well we I mean we know that all the time you know I can't turn my phone off but but really if if I'm going to make it a point that my kids can't have a phone at the dinner table then my husband and I need elsewhere turn off the sound when you come upstairs you know that's what I intended to do because I'm really bad at following through even on my own plan and so if I'm going on a walk with the kids so it's not even an option cuz I'll tell my cell I'm not going to check it and I won't even realize I'm checking it when I look down and it's in my hand or one of my kids is that hey Mom you said you were going to use your phone so it's just so ingrained in us and we just want to again kind of continue to have that mindfulness I read this article and I thought it was very interesting and so dr. Joe Walsh be presented a few years ago at The Isaacs concert concert conference that we all attended and I did you ever sessions and I was just really Blown Away with a lot of her research and just her approach in general to technology because it was kind of the first time that it had been presented to me that you know it's not a bad thing that is around so let's just help our children and how can we do that and I just think it really lines up with you know with what we do here at school and just really helping our kids become capable of handling this and so she wrote an article and she basically makes the statement that the most important you can do is gain with your child about her Middle School son who wants to play fortnite and she's even though she's in the you know Tech research World she's completely stopped in her tracks by this and didn't want to let him because of what she knows about fortnite but instead she decided that I'm going to sit down I'm going to game with him and then kind of walks through how this helped her and their relationship and kind of help them with this mindfulness I have a lot of words on it I know but I just really wanted you to come to have these step though she says sit down and play the game with your child and you even if it isn't your ideal game with I like love to think about my kids are not into video games that they like to watch people unwrapping toys YouTube and I can think of nothing worse but if I'm going to allow them to sit down and watch the video then I need to sit down and watch these videos with him not just so I can be aware of what they're watching which isn't but if it gives us a chance to engage with them on something that they like it allows us to ask questions you know pass why you like watching videos of people unwrapped toys you don't have right and then it lets your if your your kid that little warm fuzzy oh look mom really likes what I like she's listening she's watching and it lets your child be the expert for the minute for a minute and a teaching you know that the game like I would have no idea how play any sort of video game right so like they get to be the teacher in that you know that's a really powerful feeling for our children, she said when she talking about gaming what's the down for an hour you know which feel so hard for us to get laundry we got a million other things to do but she was like make the time sit down for an hour if you can't stomach playing the game for an hour and then sit there and watch your child oh what's that how'd you do that and then come back for that follow-up conversation and another and you know another time later that evening another day and she said you know start with tell your child what you like about the game and then ask them what have you gotten better at since you started playing this game right and against that metacognition for some of our kids we really have to kind of guide then there are others depending on the age will be able to tell you that but you know did you try different strategy when you didn't win is it fun to communicate with friends you know on the head pipe has that while you're playing I'm like the horizon do you know asking them what have they gotten better at right what is that still you know as adults personally I have been something positive about video games video games especially the war games like we're were very kind of ingrained in us to think o my gosh no but doctor Walsh talks about and if you have a video gamer reach out to me because she recommends a book called superbetter that is all about video games and how those skills can actually apply to life in civilian gaming can be very good and positive if you do my husband and his friends are all like they work for like Elon Musk really smart people and so just just trying to help him identify you know those skills that they use in gaming so creative problem-solving while when I when you were playing I thought you couldn't get in this way so you turned around and you thought to go a different way or you you you died this time but then you thought about doing it differently right those are skills that were teaching here in class they're collaborating often and working together even though it's definitely you know I've never seen a kid you know be so optimistic or determined then when I watch my nephew play video games because he will lose over and over and over and over again but he still there and he still trying again and so you know kind of holding it and helping them identify that communication for a lot of them they love this connection of being able to message thing on what it is and then also being able to talk on the head site at that to strategize and work together helping them in that conversation apply the positive gaming skills to their you know offline life and and helping them see how just as they're doing in the game they were able to do I'm in person right now your kids struggling with the group project when you were playing fortnite and you didn't know what to do you stopped and asked your friend right at the game so how can we do that with this projects app that you can make sure that they can see that second you guys can go ahead and read this but I really liked this quote about allowing our kids to I be bored and sit from times without the tech I like allow that you know I mean they're going to be upset and that's okay kids are going to be upset they're not going to know why we're kind of drawing these boundaries so at this point we could kind of PODS Olivia were there any questions that were coming up as we were talking no question talk about those now or any comment about their experiences wasn't talking about on phones list of what's missing for Benson Sofia from the Middle School Hannah brings a whole nother level of whatever to it that the parameters that we set for time on the phone don't seem to work like we said it for a window where it's from these hours and he can still access it be on time and I don't know if he's doing work around Apple iPhone just doesn't really work you guys have any thoughts on that or experienced controls are not working well and honestly do not on my iPad and I've seen it on the iPad I've never looked at the at the actual phone but I mean both Apple products and so that I don't really have much information on week I can kind of look into that he had heard anybody else has any experience with that he has it up on my own phone to us have to have course acquire his phone and do you have the thing where he's part of a family thing and Michael and I both have access to the control we do his phone is supposed to be off from like I do remember the time 8 till 7 a.m. and also said how long you can use it and he and we've allowed certain apps to go whenever like his messages or text messages are limited game not able to access the game be on it for hours beyond what the time frame was allotted and just think of that but I don't know if he's figured out some work around the password with his individual when you can actually go in and do the same thing and put password in his individual phone I would go that far with it and to go into his phone and set up a screen time and you can also do the individual ask things like that as well but it'll ask for a passcode to get back in after they've been set down and if you make it complex and he's not going to be able to figure out that past so I would actually go one step farther and go I think if you go into his actual phone and set the screen time that that might help because there is no way unless he has that passcode that you can bypass that unless it is to figure out a workaround screw the other way so I would be I would caution against using the phrase there is no way he will be able to work around it because there is nothing so creative as a middle school boy is trying to get around I'll just give you an example to the 10 p.m. and 8 a.m. will even talk to and my son still figured out that he could turn on the wireless hotspot on my phone and connect to that and then use that as a I'm at the that's just one of many potential Browns that are in there so I will say that you can work really hard on trying to help them overcome their lack of self-regulation but if anybody actually figured out how to teach Charles self-regulation please let me know because I would be fantastic don't have access to that device with an almost graduating high school that's going to be pretty difficult to do those conversations escalate pretty quickly as I'm sure that you know would understand conversations about diving back into when you start to when your kids start to get extremely text Abby and this is obviously in the middle and high school area that's when you start having conversations about what what makes you feel good what makes you not feel good what's the real quality of some of these platforms and some of the things that are seen and what are your hopes for them that they would take away from some of those experiences that they've seen so you know it's recalibrating helping your kids eat past some of the things that they might have gotten access to and their older years and how you want them to operate as a person moving forward Even After experiencing some of those things so that's awesome for later for later I'm finna go back into the social emotional really because sometimes it is by Kyle says almost at the grade school level. me to do most of them aren't going to Deep dive into into the website understand how to do work around and yeah just being you know like Olivia said just being aware and knowledgeable about the popular app and games and websites you know like Facebook there is weight there are ways to add parental controls there are ways to help your child in on what they're doing go on Instagram following you know I know we talked about and I'll feed you like Instagram help them find people that are inspirational to know if they're really into soccer or football finding athletes that can help Inspire them to follow or people who post you know things that can just lift them up you know so encouraging them to follow people and account that are possible rather than you know painting that unrealistic social media identity that we so often see you'll platforms like Tik-Tok are not they're not child of any age friendly you know I see famous on Tik-Tok adult it just heard me right because as you if you guys aren't familiar with Tick Tock it literally is just a video dream there's no Home Base I mean you have your own account but it calibrated South based off of the videos that you spend the most time on so weird ample if a child is spending a lot of time on a video with girls dancing Tik-Tok dances they're going to get a whole lot more videos of those of girls dancing to those Tik Tok song there is no way to parental control Tik-Tok for example and I think two at the why Nick would Tick Tock I think I didn't have a Tik-Tok account until like 2 weeks ago when I knew I was going to do this all about I see of course a lot of the little short real than video the measure on you can find them on YouTube you can find them on Instagram but I signed up I did not select any of my preferences just because I wanted to see what would happen this the third video that was extremely inappropriate and so I Hubbard on it a minute because I was like. It was really happening so then immediately I'm getting more videos like this and I actually told I think I'll pull up Tik Tok and while starts rolling and I was doing that just a few minutes ago before we began the content of what was showing up just filled it's so inappropriate that I'm choosing not to pull it up girl for you but if you you know if you have a kid who that they like to talk or think they like Tik toks you know it's because he's cute little funny animal videos and really doing some of the dances are fun but very absolutely no way as a parent for you two to have any control over what pops up on your child screen and and there are no filters so we just really wanted you to make sure everyone here is that I've had to that conversation with family members who have younger kid to think that a whole gaming article go on Tik-Tok with your child and and you'll see how quickly you're having too quickly scroll over videos because they can they come out of nowhere and there they're there there's a variety and this isn't point you know something feels confusing there was a video about someone like not being kind of animal you know I think an accident on primary or intermediate they're going to have her over that video because it's unbelievable and it and it's confusing but everyone's laughing and said there's just a lot of content that you know we would want our kids to pee and if they didn't you want to be there yeah I think it's maybe it's that they are not talk outside of your might have to be sitting in the same room as you add you while you are no partially watching what's coming up then also able to have we also amplify what you were just saying it's a really easy rule of thumb is that anything that involves content that is delivered from outside of your house is absolutely out of your control earlier in the talk you mentioned I Roblox this is one of any number of game platform to create games and then sell services through that that platform and you just got to understand that anytime you're allowing your child to connect outside of your house you have already lost control of what it is that they're watching or where am I taking in and it's it's a sad but true State of Affairs that anybody who's participating in those online environments in like a multiplayer chat or something like that are kind of the most toxic of their age group anyway you would not want to have your child actually in a verbal chat playing fortnite or League of Legends or any of the other mini games that are on there because the people who actually engage in discussion are the ones who have no filter whatsoever one of the things that's really difficult to grasp at first issue is the idea that there's a lot of great content out there but anytime you involve anybody else it get your experiences going to go down unless it's a very tightly controlled group of friends really easy to just assume that your child is name something that every other kid is doing and playing the way that every other kid is playing and there's things like like Roblox and other games even Minecraft that I have no as a relatively text person but I have no frame of reference what that means Ryan Tik Tok it for example is relatively new and prior to you know it's kind of getting big I had no idea what it was though just so Millie Rising yourself with the platform and what it brings to the table for your child and then you determining if that's right for your family and I think from there you kind of have to get those boundaries where you feel comfortable and maybe it's that all social media if you can have to take place in your present right certainly setting up to their bedroom with their cell phones or their computers or tablets may not be what's best for your child depending on your child and so it's going to be unique from family to family but just knowing that there's programs out there like Tik-Tok that I would not recommend for children and even teenagers like it's a it's a scary place it can be gross and disturbing and I'm way wildly inappropriate for even adult I see things on there that I don't want to see right though most of mine are about like crafting things because that's what I hover on but there comes up the occasional thing that I just don't want to see and I don't find appropriate and so even when you're searching you do bunnies something you know Bunny might come up you're right so they talked for one is something if you take anything away from this is something that you should be mindful of pause and at the end of our slideshow here I've I put up a bunch of different links to some of them are article Gill Walsh who I am when I when I do the talk I feel like I'm obsessed with but I really like her and I really like her stuff and she has a Blog and a website called digital age and that's where I found a couple of Articles and a couple of her blog post Common Sense Media I'm sure it's something that everyone has heard of they are it's just a a great landing place of if you're feeling confused or you're feeling like you want some guidance and you don't know where to start I would start there but we here I'm in technology when I have your child we do the digital citizenship program through Common Sense Media and we do talk about media use and balance but recently we've been talking about just online relationship so you know relationship and and what the different types look like and then you know really kind of what are the tools that that they have to decide whether it's an okay relationship when is this not a lot of the when I asked them how do you connect with people online a lot of them stay like I text on my mom's phone with you know my friend through her mom's phone so there's a lot of that kind of conversation with 4th and 5th graders IQ feels like the bars are starting to DM like direct message in some of these little games they're playing and I hear often from Roblox you know that inappropriate things are being said to them or someone is being unkind and so you're there are up so far they're all very quick. I tell a parent I leave the chat I say I don't that's not appropriate you know and we're and we are started we're talkin about privacy what information to share online with information not to share online and so I just encourage you to visit Common Sense Media and any other a piece articles or site that you find helpful just to be continued in that conversation cuz I know Gina you know her oldest is in middle school and so she is being first and just how you know how much that technology the ants upright there's much more of an expectation from the school perspective of what you're using and then I think socially it just becomes like kind of like a Snowball Effect and I'm sure I don't have a middle school student but I'm sure it would feel very and Gary so there's there's a couple of resources here I know Olivia sent out the PDF of this slideshow presentation so you can accept that and refer to it and then she'll also be posting the recording of this on the website under the Community parent Ed videos so if you have questions or if you want to email us directly were happy to help her answer any find the PDF is acceptable in this meeting request but it is also I'm going to be attached to Enid's as well as a straight to you I'm free to be able to take home I think that you know one of what I want you guys to know freshly starting with this kind of age group specially primary and and these younger you know Intermediate kids is that technology is here today right not something that's going to go away it's not something that you're going to be able to keep it from your child and so too kind of hopefully start to build the skills now that when they are teenagers they have some of these skills going forward and they have things that they rely on in their life make them happy and to have connections with that don't involve technology so really trying to set them up for those years that we know we're going to be difficult in middle school and high school and just setting the boundaries feel right for your family while knowing that it's here to stay and we just have to kind of figure out what works for our child in our family there any other questions that's all we have for you so few

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